Have you ever felt that you reached the lowest point of your life? That you have hit rock bottom, that something is wrong for you? And despite that you refuse to face the truth? And you persist in believing that you have the situation under control?
While deep inside, your little inner voice is whispering to you: “Where is this going? We can’t go on this way! You’re leading us straight into the wall! We need help to recover, regain strength and start over.”
This is what happened to me! I knew I was losing control, that the situation was getting out of my hands! But instead of facing the facts, I kept making the same actions and having the same thoughts without questioning myself. Yet the diagnosis was clear, genuine, and unambiguous: “Madam, your migraines are symptoms of depression…”
I did not want to hear or understand! I preferred to remain in denial: “We can not have a depression at 23!” ; “Antidepressants are for migraines” ; “It’s just a slump, I’m going to recover quickly”; “Everything is going well in my life: I am young, married, I have beautiful children…”.
And I went on that way, until one day… I do not know when, how, or what triggered this admission: but one day, I found myself in intensive care. My body had decided to be heard. It said STOP: “I see the truth”. It had become so weak that my mind had no power over it. My body refused any medicine! Just raising the hand was quite a feat! I was totally unaware!
I was actually ignorant. I had achieved many degrees, I was a young modern and educated woman, but totally ignorant in the field of life. I did not know that a “simple” depression could lead to intensive care! I did not know that my mind and my body had to work together in the process of life! I did not know that it was important to maintain a balance between the two!
After 15 days of intensive care, I had enough time to make a choice and decided to take action and overcome my fear.
I decided to take back control of my life instead of enduring it! To become the lead actress of my life and not just a spectator!
To begin, I made the decision to stop taking the medication. My doctor has decreed that I would need 1 year to achieve this! One year is a long time…
Have you ever experienced a situation in which you do not know where your choices are leading you, but at the same time, you feel that you’re guided in your decision that you do not even ask yourself questions? You know deep inside that you have made the right decision! You just decide to trust yourself.
That’s what I did ! I decided to trust myself, to trust my body! And I managed to stop the anti depressants in just 3 months!
For that, I learned to respect and listen to my body. Understand its moments of weakness and recognize its victories as small as they are (as little as they could be). We learned to live together in love and gratitude.